Dealing with grief and loss 2021

The COVID-19 pandemic has changed our daily lives and routines in a matter of a few short weeks, generating uncertainty and anxiety. For most of the population, coping at this time is extremely stressful as we adjust to staying home and distancing ourselves from others. It is especially challenging if someone you loved has died during the pandemic, whether or not their death was a result of COVID-19.

One factor that has contributed to emotional well-being challenges and traumatic is going through loss and grieving during a pandemic

Acknowledge that we are in a different time                                                   

Doing so helps to manage our expectations of ourselves and others

  • Living in a pandemic has changed so much of how our society functions, including our day-to-day lives, how we care for the sick, how we care for the dying and how we care for the bereaved.

  • Our sense of control has been challenged at all levels.

  • Routines and rituals that normally bring comfort aren't readily accessible, which can increase feelings of isolation and loss.

 

The grieving process

Grieving is a highly individual experience; there’s no right or wrong way to grieve. How you grieve depends on many factors, including your personality and coping style, your life experience, your faith, and how significant the loss was to you.

Inevitably, the grieving process takes time. Healing happens gradually; it can’t be forced or hurried and there is no “normal” timetable for grieving. Some people start to feel better in weeks or months. For others, the grieving process is measured in years. Whatever your grief experience, it’s important to be patient with yourself and allow the process to naturally unfold.

How to deal with the grieving process

While grieving a loss is an inevitable part of life, there are ways to help cope with the pain, come to terms with your grief, and eventually, find a way to pick up the pieces and move on with your life.

  1. Acknowledge your pain

  2. Accept that grief can trigger many different and unexpected emotions

  3. Understand that your grieving process will be unique to you

  4. Support yourself emotionally by taking care of yourself physically

  5. Recognize the difference between grief and depression

 

The five stages of grief

  1. Denial: “This can’t be happening to me.”

  2. Anger: “Why is this happening? Who is to blame?”

  3. Bargaining: “Make this not happen, and in return I will ____.”

  4. Depression: “I’m too sad to do anything.”

  5. Acceptance: “I’m at peace with what happened.”

If you are experiencing any of these emotions following a loss, it may help to know that your reaction is natural and that you’ll heal in time. However, not everyone who grieves goes through all of these stages and that’s okay. Contrary to popular belief, you do not have to go through each stage in order to heal. In fact, some people resolve their grief without going through any of these stages. And if you do go through these stages of grief, you probably won’t experience them in a neat, sequential order, so don’t worry about what you “should” be feeling or which stage you’re supposed to be in.

 

Plan for Post-COVID-19

Making plans helps us feel more in control

  • Make a 'to-do' list of tasks that you will need to complete when the restrictions ease

  • Plan a memorial event or service for your loved one if you weren't able to during the pandemic

  • Consider attending a support group for bereaved families who were affected by the COVID-19 pandemic

  • Consider Professional Bereavement Counselling

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