Parents can be bullies too 2022

Parents can be bullies too

Parenting is a tricky business. Over the years, untold experts and parenting books have presented “the best” way to parent to support the production of obedient, responsive children, with ideal grades, ideal friendships and a warm, pleasant disposition.

While encouraging children to behave in ways that are considered reasonable, respectful and considerate is not problematic, the manner in which parents go about teaching these skills can be. If parents hope to raise peaceful children, one argument goes, should they not also engage in peaceful parenting?

Every interaction you have with your child is a form of communication. It’s not just about the words you say: The tone of your voice, the look in your eyes and the hugs and kisses you give – all convey messages to your child. The way you communicate with your child not only teaches them how to communicate with others, but it also shapes their emotional development and how they build relationships later in life.

Communication can be either verbal or nonverbal and nowadays written communication such as WhatsApp messages forms an integral part of the way parents communicate with their children. Text messages can unfortunately also open the door for misunderstandings or misinterpretations and even cruelty.

Name calling, guilt-tripping, smothering, unsolicited advice, and intrusion – there are many ways that relationships and communication between family members can become less than ideal. Depending on a range of factors, people may define unhealthy relationships differently.

Effective communication builds understanding and trust. When parents or carers understand and trust each other, you’ll all be better able to work together to support children’s wellbeing and development.

What is Peaceful Parenting?

Peaceful parenting is a parenting method created by Dr. Laura Markham, a clinical psychologist and author of several parenting books on the subject. Her philosophy is based on the understanding that authoritarian parenting is far more isolating and frightening for a child than it is nurturing and that children need the support of unconditional love, in addition to understanding, empathy and effective communication from parents.

It is a parenting philosophy that requires letting go of the reigns of control, in favour of a more dialogue-heavy understanding approach.

Peaceful Parent = Happy Kids

In her parenting book “Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids, How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting,” Dr. Laura Markham strives to equip every parent to build healthy relationships with their kids, set limits with the intention of protecting instead of controlling and helping children develop and understanding of how to regulate their emotions.

Laura Markham emphasizes that a peaceful parent focuses on coaching rather than controlling. They want to foster their child’s development into a unique individual.

Calmness, Active Listening and Collaboration

Have you ever started yelling without even thinking about it, reacting to your own emotions instead of your child’s? It happens to every angry or frustrated parent at some point. Breathwork and cultivating your own sense of calm and focus are some of the most important parts of this philosophy. After all, if you are unable to stay grounded in moments of crisis, frustration, or irritation, how are you going to respond to your child’s unhappy feelings, which are often borne of crisis, frustration, and irritation?

Active listening is another important tenet, as one of your greatest goals is developing the ability to truly listen to your child and to have your child or children listen to you.

Implementing a new parenting method can be difficult, particularly if you or your children struggle with anger, anxiety, or other issues.

Do you want to enhance your parenting skills? We can help.

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